Author: Head Candy Corn

Posted on

Candy Corn Oreos: A Gothtober Review


CANDY CORN OREOS. They are real. Earlier that week, Sebastian and I struck OUT trying to find them at the Eagle Rock Target, which made us wonder if it was all just a joke, but honestly, we were just too early in trying to get them. Erin found them easily just a couple days afterward and said that the store had an entire section packed to the gills with the things, so if you want them now, it should be very easy to procure a bag. All the Halloween stuff is up as well.

Our specialized candy corn OREO testing lab was located at Rosemary’s house. Rosemary is a big fan of Gothtober, and with daughter, Lori, is collaborating on what will be DAY 15 on the Gothtober calendar.

So we had Erin who BOUGHT the Candy Corn Oreos, Rosemary and Jason who supervised us, and Lori and Erin and I were the courageous guinea pigs. Erin was especially brave, because she had a very traumatic candy corn barf story from her youth that involved winning a giant bag of candy corn in a drawing contest and eating the entire bag of tri-color candies… resulting in bright orange projectile uh… fireworks.

Upon opening the bag and taking out the tray, Lori said “Oooh, they’re pretty!”

Now… we could just hate on these, because they are absolutely artificial and outside of the regular OREO realm of decency. But Erin made a good point: What is a candy corn supposed to be?” Corn?!? No, it’s not supposed to be corn. It’s a reminder of corn, especially since it’s three times the size of a regular kernel of corn. Candy corns, invented in the 1880s are naturally predisposed to the artificial flavors that are the hallmark of its candy-ness. Once upon a time when candy corns were hand made, the predominant flavors were honey and vanilla. Those flavors are easy enough to imitate in today’s lightning speed automated factories. Even Brachs candy corn has artificial flavoring, in addition to the real honey of its recipe. So when you open the bag, you get a whiff of “artificial flavor” which didn’t surprise us one bit. We’re not bothered that a cookie with artificial ingredients is attempting to replicate a candy that also possesses artificial ingredients.

We peeled the cookie halves apart, and could see the divided filling which contains one half of yellow, the other half is orange. I was able to separate the filling into two separate units of color for tasting. Can’t be positive, but it seems like the yellow side had more of a candy corn taste. But at that point, I might’ve just been high on sugar. It’s definitely a very sweet cookie, and Lori said “Since I first started eating them I began talking a lot more.” We were all talking a lot more.

I’d have to say that if the customary white, orange and yellow coloring and the triangular shape makes a candy corn, so does the texture. Ultimately, this is how the candy corn OREO fails, because a candy corn just isn’t a cookie, and vice versa. A candy corn’s weird waxlike density combined with the sugary vanilla flavoring is the ultimate juxtaposition of what will convince your mouth that something “tastes” like candy corn. Otherwise, this cookie just tastes like frosting between two sandwich cookie pieces, which crumbles into very non-candy-corn-like disorderly particles.

Out of 10 points, 10 being the best, we gave it a 5. Why a 5? It stands alone as a very sweet cookie, the filling seems like the kind of pre-packaged tubes of frosting that is sold in the cake aisle of the grocery store. The quality of the “cookie” part of the OREO is quite good, very crisp and simple. You’d never in a million years know it was candy corn flavored if you tried one of these in a blind taste test. And you might be sort of turned off by the artificial flavors… but after time goes by, you might feel like eating another one just because its there.

Posted on

Spotlight on Seafoam Salad!


We’re on a food bandwagon for the moment, finding ways to bide our time until Gothtober launches, and since we’ve been covering autumnal or scary foods, I thought I’d focus on a “scary” one that surprisingly, offers some history. It all started when my friend, Shannon Gallagher, handed me Church Suppers from Publications International, Ltd. saying “Oh, I’ve been meaning to give this to you.”
This collection of edible Americana is a dedicated treasury of time-honored baked, boiled, whirled, tossed, stirred and chilled masterpieces that have graced the counters and tables of religious organizations across the nation. But of all the casseroles, gelatins, puffs, spreads and crunches, the one that really conveys a pious yet humble and down-home type of American determination might be “Seafoam Salad.”
Seafoam salad is mint green, but tastes nothing like mint.
Seafoam salad is full of surprises.
The very illustrious and strange Seafoam salad was popularized by the lunch counter at Woolworth stores (officially open for business in 1878) and exists within the pantheon of the all-time great dessert salads. Unlike Waldorf salad (first created between 1893 and 1896 at the Waldorf Hotel in New York City) Seafoam salad’s dominating flavor leans toward sweet, not savory. Over the years, depending upon the region you were raised in, a Seafoam salad might contain pears or pineapples, maraschino cherries, mayonnaise or other unknown variations with the purpose of providing a “high performance” eating experience for luncheons, schools and congregations of sorts.
Seafoam salad is green and creamy or lumpy, which seems sort of like a perfect Halloween dish to me, which is why I’ll share this current version from PIL’s Church Suppers so that you have the most up-to-date version on hand.

INGREDIENTS:

2 cans (8 oz. each) Crushed pineapple in juice
1 package (4 serving size) lime gelatin
1 cup boiling water
1/2 cup cold water
1 package (8 oz.) cream cheese
3/4 cup coarsely chopped pecans
2/3 cup celery slices
1 1/2 cups thawed whipped topping

1.) Drain pineapple in sieve. Squeeze pineapple to remove most of the juice. Reserve 3 tablespoons of juice
2.) Place gelatin in medium bowl; stir in boiling water until gelatin is desolved. Stir in cold water and reserved 3 tablespoons pineapple juice.
3.) Beat cream cheese in large bowl with electric mixer until smooth. Beat in 1/4 cup gelatin mixture until blended. Slowly beat in remaining gelatin mixture. Chill until thick, about 1 hour.
4.) Stir in pineapple, pecans and celery. Fold in whipped topping. Pour into clear glass serving dish. Chill about 2 hours or until set.
Makes 8 to 10 servings, WOOOOO!

Posted on

The Spice is on the Pumpkin, and the Pumpkin’s in the Latté

According to Frank Woo, International Handsome Man of Mystery, CraftNight Crafter and Starbucks employee extraordinaire, your pumpkin-flavored sipping experience has officially arrived! 

Technically, it’s not Fall until September 22nd, but if you’ve just got to have the taste of nutmeg and clove and spicy sassy pumpkin that sets the scene for “October’s Bright Blue Weather” you can get started right this very minute without an iota of hesitation. I believe you can also get it in Frappé form, AND salted caramel mochas are also available.

Matter of fact, I dare you to get some Candy Corn Oreos and wash them down with a pumpkin spice latté and see if your glycemic index forces each of your teeth to hum in four-part harmony. It’s an indecent request, but worth trying, in the interest in order to live a rich, full life, especially if you survive.

Thanks Frank!

 

Posted on

Candy Corn Oreos: REAL (Arriving September 10th)

Absurd! And for $3.59 at a Target near you through Halloween, Kraft has done it again. And by “it again” I mean some sort of torridly bizarre yellow-colored food aimed at reeling in the curious, the depraved, the risky thrill seekers on the edge of sanity… yes, we’re trying them. Mind you, Kraft brought us “macaroni & cheese” the tell-tale blue and yellow box with the lil’ noodles and the powdered yellow stuff that you stir into margarine and water to make… an exciting pile of YELLOW, best served with hot dog pennies. In Canada they simply call it “Kraft Dinner.” Whether it’s pasteurized processed individually wrapped cheese slices, Mac & Cheese or now… Candy Corn Oreos, Kraft is one of the grand daddies of natural and artificial flavors, and don’t you forget it.

This cookie ingenue has a filling that’s half yellow, half orange. Those of us who like candy corn will probably be all weirded out but want to try them anyway. It’s so wrong it’s right. It’s a conversation piece for your autumnal office party. They taste like modern times. This is everything we’ve fought for, or so they’d have us believe.

They’ll be sweet, in any case. They have to be, right?  I mean, the deal is, if a new flavored chip is on the market, you’re going to taste the trippy powder sprayed ON the chip. And as far as these candy corn Halloween Oreos go… we’re looking at the “blonde” oreo sandwich cookie part… and a different flavored “filling.” Because they make “birthday cake” flavored Oreos, a big deal as it’s the 100th year of making these little cookies that America’s been eating column by column since 1912. The consensus so far is that any auxiliary Oreo flavor basically tastes like sugary frosting. I remember the bright red double stuffed bag of Oreos stolen from the kitchen when we were burglerized in the 90s. Ah, the good ol’ days.

BUT ANYWAY WOW! This has NEVER existed before, a Candy corn flavored Oreo! They used the “blonde” cookies instead of the original chocolate to make it look more like a candy corn. Is that sad? Would chocolate have tasted better? If you picked up one of these not knowing it’s “candy corn” flavored, would you KNOW what it’s supposed to be emulating? Will the subtle honey and vanilla flavors of actual candy corn be apparent in this novelty snack?

Not a lot of people know that a “lemon” version of Oreos was available briefly in 1920, and in China it just gets crazy, with peach, mango and blueberry, some sort of spirited fruit campaign goes on over there. I’ve got friends in China… I need to see these. Chile and Argentina both have Dulce de Leche and Chocolate Oreos, how do we get some?

Anyway, that’s the crazy snack news flash, at some point I’ll tell you what they taste like, and there will be photos. I kind of hope you’re outraged and disgusted so that we can torment you further with more news about it. I love cookie gossip.

 

Posted on

The Gothtober Artists are IN!!!


After a laborious Labor Day Weekend of hemming and hawing, figurer-outering and making it all fit together for the best gosh darn 10th Anniversary Gothtober EVARRRRR… the names are IN, and here are the artists that will be participating in this year’s exceptional mixed bag of creepy crazy fun! Thank you everyone who applied, if we didn’t catch you this year, we’ll surely be creeping toward you the next year! Now then, the sluice gates are open, the cauldron’s firing up, got plenty of jars of dried newt tails and pixie dust, time to make stuff woooooooooooooooooooo!!!!

Posted on

Gothtober Applications Due Midnight TONIGHT!


Gothtober ghoulies, lizards and ghosts,
Sign on the line and give us a toast!

Tonight will be midnight, the time to respond,
Please fill out the app from somewhere beyond!

Vampires and monsters from last Halloween,
Join us and send over frights unforeseen!

We thank you for being a part of our gang,
The 10th year of Gothtober will start with a BANG!

Posted on

Gothtober Calling YOU!

Dear Creative Crusty Creative Creeps,

Gothtober’s crooked moon approaches and we want you to be in the pumpkin patch for our 10th Anniversary!

APPLICATIONS DUE AUGUST 29th, 2012 • Participants will be notified of admission by September 6th at the latest. Upon acceptance, a $25 registration fee is required.

1.) Apply HERE

2.) The Theme is “10” a.) The number 10 in some way (10 items on screen, 10 tips for severing fingers, 10 recipes, 10 sounds, just… 10, y’know? b.) OR you can ignore the “10” theme and make your piece all spooky, creepy, crazy, weirdy, autumny, candy, fun and freaky Halloween theme like the original Gothtober from 2003. There will be a lot of pumpkins in Gothtober’s design this year, so also… if you want to have your piece involve America’s favorite round orange squash, knock yourself out!

3.) More information on how to make a Gothtober piece is on our Gothtober FAQ

4.) All the latest news about Gothtober can be found right here on the Gothtober BLOG

5.) And of course… if you want to gain inspiration from Gothtober itself, visit GOTHTOBER! 

Slimy Slippery Slugs,

JP Head Candycorn

 

Posted on

Creepy L.A. is Looking for Coffin Hunt Artists!

Coffins aplenty, coffins abound, your world could be full of tiny arty coffins… if you just let the spirits wander where they may. Participate in creating the creepiest coffin you can for Creepy LA’s Coffin Hunt! Check out this gallery of coffins to see the amazing coffins from 2011, and register to decorate a coffin that some poor (lucky) soul will find in a significantly historically creepy or crazy or morbid or weird location of Los Angeles!

Here’s the skinny from Creepy LA:

  • Participating artists will each be sent TWO coffins by the end of August. They will need to decorate, design, and return their finished work to CreepyLA by October 1st.
  • Artist will be responsible for all costs of designing and decorating the coffins.
  • One of the coffins will be used in the Coffin Hunt, given away, free, at CreepyLA’s discretion.
  • The coffin not used in the hunt will be used in a Kickstarter campaign or a related promotion to help raise money to cover the costs of the Coffin Hunt. Artist will receive 50% of any sales, Kickstarter or otherwise, this coffin is sold through.
  • Each participating artist will have their Facebook fan page, if available, and/or link to their personal site tagged or mentioned on Hidden Los Angeles and CreepyLA’s Facebook pages, exposing them to hundreds of thousands of online impressions.

Sound good? Then please fill out their form by August 16th. Selected artists will be notified by August 23rd!